Sandy Gennaro

00:00Welcome to Nashville Restaurant Radio, the tastiest hour of talk in Music City. Now here's your host, Brandon Styll. Hello Music City and welcome to Nashville Restaurant Radio. We are presented by Gordon Food Service. My name is Brandon Styll and I am your host. We have got a great one for you today on this Grand Prix, Music City Grand Prix weekend. Going to the weekend, we are talking rock and roll. We are going to be talking with Sandy Gennaro. Sandy is a author. He wrote a book called Beat the Odds in Business and in Life and BEAT is an acronym that you're going to learn in this episode. Sandy is an interesting guy because he was in the room.

01:03He was the drummer. He's a drummer for Cyndi Lauper and he tells the story of walking in the room and seeing her with half her shaved head and the pink hair and he does a great Cyndi Lauper impression, but he went from Cyndi Lauper to Joan Jett. He played with the Monkees. He's a rock and roll guy and we got talking and I told him that Howard Stern is one of my inspirations. He goes, I've been on Howard Stern a couple of times. He actually sent me the video of him on Howard Stern and I'm starstruck. It was really, really cool. Really fun to have him in the studio and I think you're going to love some of the stories that he is going to tell and it's inspirational too. I think that he talks about attitude and the little things in life that you do every single day that the dominoes that fall and I love it. So we got into both of our stories. I think you're going to like it. The Mexican restaurant bracket is out right now, guys. It's tight. It is tight. There's a couple runaways.

02:03There's a couple that are just absolutely running away with it and then there's a bunch of them that are like one to two votes away. So go to NashvilleRestaurantRadio.com. On the homepage right there, you can scroll down just a little bit. The first section says vote for your favorite Mexican restaurant. This is brought to you by NetChex and NetChex is an amazing partner. They're your HR solution, payroll solution, scheduling solution, so many solutions that they have. Lauren Demaine over there has done such an amazing job of setting this up. We break down the entire bracket in an episode, the last episode with Kayla Ellis and the Gospel of Cocktail podcast. That was a lot of fun. So go check it out. These places need your vote. Go share the post if you can and if you're a Mexican restaurant out there, go tell your Mexican restaurant. We're trying to get to everybody and everybody's not responding. But hey, look, round two is going to come up on Monday. We're going to post the heck out of it this weekend. You guys tell your friends, post in all of the sites and let's crown an official the best Mexican restaurant in Nashville. We're going to have the final four of them on the show hopefully and then we're going to do a we're going to do a whole party there on September 15th for the winter.

03:10So it's going to be a lot of fun. We are also doing Brandon's Book Club. The book this month is called The Comfort Crisis and it is by Michael Easter and this is going to be brought to you by Robin's Insurance. Yes, the insurance company for you, if you own a restaurant, they specialize in restaurant insurance and they're local. You know, I had lunch with Matthew Clements and Van Robbins the other day and we just had so much fun talking about all the people we know and all the just the things that we do individually to help and where we're at and I told him, I said, it's so fun every time I meet a restaurateur and I say, who do you use your insurance through? And they go, ah, progressive or somebody like, man, you need to have a guy. You need to be able to call Matthew Clemens and say, dude, I have an issue or whatever it is. You got to have a local guy. You have to have a local girl, somebody who you can rely on every single time you need anything in the insurance world. And that's what they do. And they're really amazing. Matthew Clements with Robin's Insurance, you can get ahold of him at 863-409-9372. But hey, guess what? They're buying the books. So if you guys want to get a copy of this book, just DM me and say, or go to Facebook.

04:14We have a Brandon's Book Club group. There's also a Facebook, Instagram Brandon's Book Club page. Just message on there and say, hey man, I want a free book and you can buy a book and then just send me the receipt and we'll then mow you the money for it. Up to 15 people. We're already at eight people that we've done that. So we're, it's, we're getting people up there. I'm really excited about this and I'd love to have you in Brandon's Book Club. Again, the book is called The Comfort Crisis by Michael Easter. Yes. All right. So we are going to jump in today with Sandy Gennaro and we've got another episode with Kayla Ellis and she's going to be speaking with Laura from the Fox Bar this Wednesday. We're excited to have that. And then Brandon, who's her head bartender at Oak will be the following Wednesday. We got lots of shows. Monday, coming up this Monday. We're going to be talking with Ben and Jamie from Pearl Diver. So excited about having those guys on. That was one of the funnest interviews I've ever done.

05:15We were in here for like an hour and a half and they are so sharp and so fun. I cannot wait to put this out for you Monday. So stay tuned. Lots of great stuff coming up. We have so many episodes we're recording Mondays, Wednesdays, and three a week coming up for the next several, several weeks. So excited. Thank you for listening. And let's jump. We've got a couple ads on the front end here and then we're going to jump right in with Sandy Gennaro. We absolutely love partnering with Sharpies Bakery. Erin Mosso has been selling bread, fresh baked bread to locally owned and operated restaurants six days a week for 36 years. Yes. Her father started the company 36 years ago and Erin took it over five years ago and it is doing amazing things. I have so many guests that come in the studio that are like, I love Sharpies. They save me so much time and the bread is so good. So we we've got round buns, specialty round buns, dinner rolls, hoagies, baguettes.

06:17They do cheesecake. They do flourless chocolate, tortes, they do specialty loaf breads and regular loaf breads and bullies. Bullies, B-O-U-L-E-S, sourdough, long Tuscan, wheat, multigrain. They got everything. You should go check them out at Sharpies.com. That is Sharpies, C-H-A-R-P-I-E-R-S dot com or you should give them a call at 615-356-0872. Supporting local is so damn important and Erin Mosso and all of our friends over at Sharpies Bakery do that daily. Give her a call right now. We are super excited to introduce Maintain IQ for restaurants. Maintain IQ is a modern digital checklist system that simplifies your operations. They are designed specifically for restaurants. You can standardize, track and manage food safety procedures, temp logs, daily checklists, preventative maintenance and ongoing repairs.

07:17He's saying that you can, managers will save up to 10 hours per week. You can repair, you can reduce repairs and maintenance spend by $5,000 a year. Staff will know what to do, how to do it and when to do it. Everything is digitally recorded. Minimize liability, ensuring safety, cleaning and compliance standards are upheld. This is the best thing since sliced bread guys and we're going to talk about that in just a second with Sharpies. But we are talking about a checklist to do every single thing in your restaurant that's all kept nice and neat in a little app. You need to call Will Jackson. His number is 888-534-0261 and set up a 30 minute demo. If you do that, I'll give you a free Nashville restaurant radio hat or I'll give you a free Nashville restaurant radio t-shirt. Just send me a message on Instagram. Check out Maintain IQ. Did you know the number one cause of methane or greenhouse gases in landfills is your food waste? Restaurants waste so much food, all the food people don't eat, all of the scraps that come from all of your prep.

08:20All gets put in a dumpster and then gets buried in a landfill and as it decomposes, creates methane gas. Well, thank God, Jeffrey Ezell and his brother Clay have come up with the compost company. You can now compost your food waste. They take it to their farm. They create organic soil out of it. They then sell that to Whole Foods as well as local farmers and landscapers. So it's literally coming full circle in your community. If you're a restaurant owner or manager, you need to be calling Jeffrey Ezell at 615-866-8152 and they will set you up with the green bags and the green trash cans that they will come empty twice a week. If you work in a restaurant and you would love to have this option instead of putting food into a trash can, you can start composting. Tell your manager to call Jeffrey Ezell. That's 615-866-8152 or follow him at the compost company on Instagram. Super excited today to welcome in Sandy Gennaro into Nashville Restaurant Radio.

09:22How are you doing? I'm doing fine, Brandon. How are you doing today? Hey, you know, on this beautiful morning, it's not raining, it's kind of a nice day today. It is a very nice day. I think it's like around 78 at the moment. Hell yeah. And it's just good to have you here. Now I've had your wife in studio. We had Sherry in here and she was amazing. She had a great time. Thank you for allowing her to come in. Oh, man. She's her own person, believe me. She makes her own decisions. Believe me. Yeah, she's awesome. So I met you at Marable. Yes. Where we, you're friends with our owner, Steven, and we had an all-employee meeting where we had the entire staff and then you came in to speak to the staff. You do some speaking engagements for a group called Vistage. Correct. And Steven's a member of Vistage. And so he knew you and asked you to come in and you said yes. And man, what an amazing story you have. It was challenging. It was challenging to try to whittle it down to 30 minutes, but it was great.

10:23And you know, the whole idea of what Steven and you do for your staff, it just speaks to how awesome your staff is. And that's part of what I speak about in my presentation is passionate leadership, service leadership. Yes. And I speak for rock stars, as well as restaurant owners and general managers. So let's let everybody in, because you said rock stars, we're like, who is Sandy Gennaro? Do we know who Sandy Gennaro is? You are a bona fide rock star. Would you say that? I don't wear that hat. I mean, I've been referred to as that. And I guess by definition, you could say yes, that I am, but I don't. I mean, you were the drummer for Joan Jett. I know, but I don't wear that hat. That's as rock and roll as it gets, right? I know it is. It is. It was awesome. So you were the drummer for Joan Jett, but first, you were the Pat Travers. Well, if you want to go chronologically, at first, my first pro gig was a band called Blackjack, which included Michael Bolton as the singer.

11:23Michael Bolton? Yeah, his name originally was Michael Bolton, B-O-L-O-T-I-N, and then when he went solo afterwards, he changed his name to Bolton when he went solo. But this is before he became a star. He was in a band called Blackjack with me, Bruce Kulick, who went on to play with Kiss for 10 years when they took the makeup off. Now he plays with Grand Funk Railroad. And Jimmy Haslip was the bass player who played, who was the musical director for the Yellow Jackets, which was like a jazz rock band, won a Grammy. So we all are still involved in the music business and still doing well. And then after that was the Pat Travers band, and then after that was Cyndi Lauper, and was a band called Kraft, a German band. I did their record and then I did the subsequent tour in support of Queen for three months in Europe, 1986, summer of 86. You toured with Queen? You opened for Queen? We opened for Queen for three and a half months in Europe.

12:23Summer of 86, it was one of the most unbelievable tours that I ever did, even though I was involved in just the opening act, who you probably never heard of and probably will never hear of, but that- You're part of the whole experience. The whole experience playing to 110,000 people, selling out soccer stadiums, 50,000. It was just playing those antique amphitheaters in Europe. The venues were awesome. And it was the last tour Freddie Mercury ever did. What do you feel like before you do a show? A hundred thousand people. Before you do that, do you do you have like a pre-show ritual? Do you get butterflies? Do you get scared? Are you like a human being? Like, you know, I get I get a different feeling inside before I go on, but it's not scared. It's the feeling you get when you see the Christmas presents beneath the Christmas tree at five in the morning before your parents get up on Christmas morning. And it's a positive anticipation. It's like it's not like going to the principal's office in school.

13:25It's like Christmas morning. And that's it's a positive anticipation. Like you can't wait to get out there. I feel that way. Some shifts that you work like we have Thanksgiving shift. He's mentioned the holidays like before Thanksgiving shift. We're going to a thousand people, which I imagine is what people who work downtown feel like every single day. Right. But like it's it's fun. It's exciting. It's very exciting. And it's and I'm so, you know, it reinforces in me a sense of appreciation of be given that opportunity to play drums, which is something I've been doing since I'm 14. Play drums in front of an audience and get paid well to do it. You know, and yeah, and be clapped for and people cheering your name and all of that. I mean, that's the payback. That's what's there not to like about about that. You know, nothing. I mean, just being of that lifestyle and everything, I want to I'm so all over the place right now because there's a million questions I have yet. Don't know where to begin. So let's begin. And I'm going to go back even further.

14:27We were talking just kind of to get started here, chit chat. And I said, I love Howard Stern. He's one of my parents. Hey, now. Hey, now. Hey, now. Hello. And I said, oh, man, I love Howard. He's kind of my inspiration. I love what he does. And then you said you've been on the show. Well, I'm not as a guest. I was on the Howard Stern show because Mark Fauner of Grand Funk Railroad was we were all part of a rock and roll fantasy camp in New York City. And Mark Fauner, being in New York, was asked to make an appearance on Howard Stern. So he wanted to play I'm your captain, which is one of his famous songs. So he was the writer and singer of Grand Funk Railroad. Yeah. Originally. So he asked me, Mark Fauner, hey, you know, he assembled a band with Bruce Kulick, Kip Winger, Teddy Andriadis, all these all these kind of famous sidemen. And we supported Mark Fauner playing on your captain on on Howard Stern. But we all had an opportunity to pose for a selfie with Howard.

15:27And he was totally cool. He was awesome. And I used to listen to him in New York when he was on regular radio, you know, before Sirius. He's he's like that one. You know, my dad is like Paul McCartney. If there's somebody I could meet that I'm just like, I just he would hate meeting me because he hates meeting people. He's just like, just leave me alone. But I would. He's one of those people that I would I would definitely walk up to. I wouldn't walk up to him in a restaurant because I know he hates that. But. I that's your fan. I'm a fan. Like now I'm impressed. Like Cindy Lauper, Joan Jett. OK, but you are on Stern show. I'm impressed now. And I'll send you a picture. I'll email you a picture of me and Howie. That's amazing. So you you are an author now, drummer, author. And we're going to get into some of your teaching and all that stuff. As we go along here, you have a book. It's called Beat the Odds. I'm holding it up right here for watching this on YouTube. It's called Beat the Odds in Business and Life by Sandy Janaro. And. Man, this is it. This is a fantastic book. The stories are really, really good and it's motivational.

16:28And I love the whole acronym Beats and everything it stands for. And Dave in the Doorway. I mean, this there's so many amazing small things. And I found a lot of it correlated to my life and. Recognize there's one moment of my rock bottom moment, the day that I decided to change my life was a big, a big rainbow. There was a rainbow that happened at this pinnacle moment in my life where I thought that everybody in the world hated me. Nothing was good. And at this very moment, I realized everything in my life is going to change. And I looked up in that moment and there was a gigantic rainbow. God wink. And if you've ever had a spiritual experience in your life and I went, if God has ever spoken to me, this is the moment right now. And I had to listen. There's no there's no part of me. I was 100 percent enveloped by this moment in my life. And I went, how many moments in my life have I missed?

17:31Because I wasn't listening or your eyes open. My eyes were closed. I wasn't listening when when God, my God was talking to me. Like, how did how did I miss? How many moments in my life have I missed? I'm 40 years old. What the hell? And you call this when the first dominoes start to fall. But let's go back to let's just tell your story. Well, what you just said, Brandon, was I call it God wink, you know, because there's a little bit of God and regardless of what terminology you use, it could be the universe, your higher self, your power greater than ourselves at work. But we all we all have a little bit of God inside of us, which is our soul, which makes us human beings different than different than a dog or a flower or something. And that's the common denominator. And I think that a lot of the human beings, because we were given free will and the power of choice, we we we shut out those opportunities. We get the signs from above, but we we we're not listening.

18:31It's all about us. You know, but when you think outside yourself in a sense of altruism and empathy for other people, you know, God. And I said, I call it a God wink when God sends you little signs. He sent you the rainbow and that feeling in your heart because you had the choice of whether ignore that or pay attention to it. And that's where free will and the power of choice comes. And if and if you're aware of that power within you and you treat people the right way, given that the common denominator is everybody has a soul from from a CEO of a billion dollar company to somebody who empties the wastebaskets of that company and everybody in between. Yeah. And your perception of things that happen to you in your life, positive or negative, that's what the universe takes care of people like that and shows you showed you a way when you saw the rainbow. And you don't have to go into detail about what changed about your life. But obviously, something did.

19:32I stopped drinking. There you go. That was the moment I did. I haven't had I've had not one sip of alcohol since that day. Congratulations. How long ago was that? Longer than two and a half years. It was October the 30th. That day was my sober date is October 28th. But the that day was October the 30th of 2019. So it was two days after you actually stopped stop taking alcohol into your body. And that was the God saying, you're doing the right thing. That was the the pat on the back, Brandon, that you that you're on the right path. And my life is full of circumstances like that. That was a turning point in your life. My life, I when I look back on it, which is one of the reasons why I wrote this book and is one of the reasons why I'm speaking about it is because upon examination, if somebody somebody simple like me with not a lot of not a tremendous amount of technical ability on the drums, it goes beyond technical technical ability about what you do. It's about how you think and what you believe.

20:34My life has been a series of those moments where you look back and you say, how the hell did that happen? And then upon examination of the steps that led up to that event, you realize that it's like, oh, because of a relationship, it's because you did somebody a favor with without anything in return, with no agenda, when nobody's watching, you do people a favor, you reach out to people, you advance people, you you make them fortunate for having crossed your path. And when that happens, the universe, you let you know, the expression is let go and let God. Well, after you act a certain way towards other people, the universe takes over and God puts the opportunities and the people and the solutions in your path that you had no idea ever existed. There's a very similar principle in AA just in the idea that I can't control everything and that you give everything away to this higher power. And then you you kind of just pray to your higher power and say, put me in the right place and let me do the next right thing. Right.

21:41Right. Do the next right thing to be inspired to do it. Yeah. And I love kind of in the introduction and the opening of your book, you talk about the power of positive thinking that every day you can wake up and think, you know, it's not just glasses, half full glasses, half empty, but everything that you do in a day. And one of my things I was reading that and I went, I'm a Monday guy. I love Mondays. I get so excited for Mondays. But what the hell is your problem? And why? Why are you this way on Mondays? I'm like, I have the entire week to accomplish so many things. Like I it's such an amazing beginning. I have all of these things I need to get done in Mondays. Like I have five days before it gets the weekend to do all these things. Right. It's not a I'm racing to get to Friday. It's like I get to I get to have this whole week to really accomplish a lot of shit. And it motivates me, it charges me. And where everybody else is like, oh, it's Monday. I'm like, it's Monday. Right. A matter of how you think. Right. Right.

22:42And you could you could have that theory about any, you know, I wake up in the morning and I say, well, thank you, God. I have another day, another day, another 24 hours to do what I want to do and, you know, accomplish what I want to accomplish. You know, you could say that about another year on New Year's Eve. You can say that about another hour. Thank you for, you know, another minute. It's a sense of appreciation for what you have as opposed to concentrating on what you don't have. Amen. Right there. Gratitude and gratitude, because psychologists say and my co-writer of the book, Steve Alevis, is a psychologist. And he told me that if you have a sense of appreciation, if you wake up in the morning and the first thing you do in that little twilight is thank goodness, thank God for the people and the things that you have been given. It's impossible to be depressed. You start out with a positive glass half full attitude, and that's what carries you through the day. It's impossible to have a sense of appreciation and be depressed at the same time, because appreciation is like light. Yeah.

23:47And depression is darkness. And you can't have darkness where there's light. That was powerful right there. What you just said. I'm telling you. But that's that's, you know, and it's only when I started speaking, I'm thinking, well, OK, well, how did I get to this point in my life? How did I get to play with certain artists like Joan Jett or Cyndi Lauper, the Monkeys or Bo Diddley or whatever, with not a lot of tremendous amount of drumming talent? Oh, stop. Come on. Nobody in my family is musically inclined. I didn't at the beginning of my career. I didn't have any, you know, stringent musical training or drum lessons at the beginning of my career. I just copied Led Zeppelin and Beatle records and and Rolling Stones records. So how did somebody with the limited ability get to where I was? We'll get to where I am 50, 56 years in the music business. And it's basically upon examination of my life, I realize that all the major gigs that I've gotten has been directly or indirectly as a result of me helping somebody or a relationship.

24:52And I've come to learn that the quality of any rock band, the success of any rock band or any company, for that matter, is based on. And you know this from being the general manager of Mere Bulls, is that a very successful, awesome restaurant here in Nashville, by the way, in Franklin, was it Franklin or Brentwood? We're in Brentwood. OK, it's it's an awesome place to eat. If you have a if you're hungry, go there. It's awesome. But the quality of of the the quality of any band or restaurant or I should say the success of any band or company is directly related to the quality of the relationships within that company or band. It's not about resume. It's not about because you know all about culture in your team. And I mean, it's right. Culture is everything. And culture equals relationships. Culture is not resume. Culture is not what college you graduated from. It's not any of that.

25:52It's about relationships. And it's about the leadership of a band or a company caring about the people, their team, the people that produce the numbers. It's not all about the numbers. It's about the people that produce the numbers and leadership's caring, having a passionate leadership vibe about their. When did you learn that? When where was the example that was really shining for you, that it was about culture and it was about people and relationships? Well, you know what? It's I didn't realize it along the way again. And when I started formulating my speaking, my speaking presentation and the book and stuff, I really I I did some self examination and I've come to that conclusion that and then you look at different companies and the success of LinkedIn, for example, and how and how LinkedIn, you know, grew with the with the advent of a new CEO that walked in and met with every single employee and whatever. It's not something that I discovered along the way.

26:55It's this I discovered it in retrospect when I examine my own life and the climb up the, you know, music business ladder, if you will. That's how that's how, you know, it was upon examination of my own life. In retrospect, it wasn't during the process, believe me. I just I just was my way. And again, you said about the rock star thing. I never put the rock star hat on. I'm always Sandy and I'm Sandy whether I'm playing in front of 110,000 people or I'm at the Kroger with somebody checking my groceries. I'm having a conversation with the person that's checking, you know, whatever. It's like every person you come in contact, every person about kindness even comes down to a smile, to someone passing you in the aisle of a supermarket with a little kid in the carriage, you smile. You know, it's just a moment of levity. It's and the universe smiles upon that vibe. So that's where I really correlate what you're talking about to the restaurant industry, because there's a there's a part in your book where you say, just saying good morning to somebody, just a genuine smile, saying good morning to somebody resonates with that person.

28:04That person, I say this all the time. I say, listen, you have no idea where people are coming from, right? We're standing in a restaurant. You're standing at the front doors as a host or a greeter or maitre d. And this person walks in the restaurant. You have no clue where their mindset is. They could have just put their dog down. They could have just got a divorce. They could just won the lottery. They could you have no clue. Just be a regular day to them. Right. But a smile, a show of genuine care and service to somebody can change. But you don't know if somebody is right on the the next bad look they get from somebody, they're going to go and their own life. Right. One smile, one hi. How are you doing? It happened to me that day. I walked into my first meeting that same day. I saw that rainbow when I thought every single person in the world hated me. Everybody. I didn't think there was one person on this planet that gave a shit about me. And I walked in that door and dude gave me a hug. He said, I got the pamphlets and I sat in the back room and a guy goes, hey, man, you knew here? And I said, yeah. And he said, welcome. And he gave me a hug.

29:04And I was like. Oh, my God, like somebody cares. Apparently, this guy doesn't hate me. He must not know me. And then he was like, no, we're all we're all people. We get it, man. We're all we've all made mistakes. Welcome to the group. Let's help you get better. And I was just like, holy shit, it was that one guy, that one moment that completely turned my life with the rainbow and the whole thing. But like it was that one, that rainbow, that believing in that rainbow got me to that meeting that got me to meet that. That was the dominoes for me. Right. That just started. And it was like, wow. You know, and what you said about you have no idea when somebody walks in the restaurant, you have no idea what what has gone on in their life in that day or whatever, or, you know, if they seem like they're really arrogant. You don't know why. And that goes to, you know, a leader in a company where somebody is not doing their job correctly as opposed to going over and reprimanding. You're not doing this right. You're not. Hey, and I've had art. I've had artists tell me this. Hey, Sandy, if you didn't have this gig, you wouldn't do anything.

30:08You know, drummers are a dime a dozen. This is this is a boss. A boss is different than a leader. But the point I was trying to bring out when somebody is pushing back or somebody is not doing their job correctly, if you ask questions, you know, as opposed to a leader reprimanding or a boss reprimanding, you know, by yelling, if you don't do this or else or whatever, you find out, hey, is there you know, ask questions like Ted Lasso said, you know, don't be judgmental, be curious. And when you're curious, you ask questions. And when you ask questions, the recipient of that question automatically thinks you care. So you go over to the person and go, hey, man, you know, the job is not being done. They're not producing the numbers or whatever. Have lunch with the person and ask them about life. Ask them about, hey, how's your family doing or whatever. And in those conversations, because you you're asking questions, they they automatically aid, think you care. And B, sometimes something will come out in that conversation that has nothing to do with the job, but that is affecting their job.

31:15I had a guitar player once in Bo Diddley's band where his his his he he wasn't performing like he was at the beginning. His performance was level was going down. He's making little mistakes. And I brought him to lunch as the musical director. I brought him to lunch one day and I discovered in that conversation that his wife just was diagnosed with breast cancer. And I said, why don't you go home and take care of it? And no, no, I need the job. I need the job. OK, well, I'll talk to Bo about a severance, some sort of severance pay or whatever, and your gig will be here when you come back. But go home and take care of your wife and get all of that settled. So the point is, is that a lot of times it's not the job itself. It's not that the person, you know, there's other reasons. Like you said, you don't know what goes on in a person's life unless you ask questions, period. I completely agree. And I love I'm going to I'm going to go reference the book for a second, because I want to get in the story. You talked about ego, you talked about bosses, and you wouldn't be anybody if you weren't that.

32:16I think in our industry, in the restaurant industry, we have a lot of there's a lot of bad bosses. I think it's been the topic of a lot of news conversations. Why is why where are the workers? Why are nobody in the restaurant industry? And I think that a lot of workers are fed up. They're fed up with poor leadership and people that, you know, have these egos. I'm a restaurant manager. You do what I say. And it's like, man, you don't have to be that way. And for you, that moment happened. You were playing with the Pat Travers band. You're playing for these sold out arenas and you're at a show. I think you are in Connecticut. You're in Connecticut. And I'm going to paint the picture and let you tell the story. OK, the end of the show happens and you're in the dressing room. And they said, hey, guys, the tour manager says, guys, I need you to get it together. Get it together. We got to go. We got to go. And everybody's kind of like, whoa, it's killer show. Sold out arena. Let's go. And so everybody's kind of packing up their stuff to leave. And you see this guy standing in the doorway kind of watching you. And you're like, oh, God, who is this? Clearly, there's a fan there that you've once an autograph you get.

33:19But but they've already told you, dude, you got to get on the bus. You got to hustle. So you you kind of relay it out. You go and you have the three options. What are your three options there? Well, the three options are the three options are I could have put the African rock star hat on and just completely blew by him. You know, the guy was standing in the doorway with a pen and a camera. And I was in a tremendous hurry and everybody else was on the bus, including the guy, Pat Travers, who was already on the bus. And so this guy is there to see the drummer. You know what I mean? And I'm going and I always had a sense of amusement about the value that certain people had about an autograph. Like, hey, they value somebody's signature. And when I was 15, I used to walk around the mall in Staten Island with my mother. And she used to say, aside from the fact that I was dressing the part, I was dressing like, you know, Led Zeppelin dressed. I was dressing like a rock star before whatever. And she used to go, my mother goes, hey, Sandy, why are you carrying that pen around? And I go, well, my case, anybody asked for my autograph.

34:21So I was like living. I was living my life at 15 years old as if I was a big, you know, whatever. So anyway, he he's got a pen and a camera and I'm rushing around. And I could have the first choice was to blow by him. The arrogant rock star. The second choice was the the friendly rock star in a hurry. Really busy. I'm really busy. I'm really sorry. I appreciate you being. I got to go. The third choice was I put the Sandy Gennaro hat on, which is I always wear 24 7 no matter what. And I said, what can I do for you, buddy? He goes, oh, man, can I have your autograph? I go, what's your name? He said Dave. So I signed and I go, OK, buddy, I got to go. He goes, well, would you take a picture of me? And he takes the camera out, takes a selfie. The instant Kodak Instamatic camera with the flash cube. 1981, this was. And I said, OK, there's your picture. You got your autograph, Dave. Thank you very much. Oh, Sandy, would you help me out getting a gig? He was a bass player in Connecticut. This was, I think, Hartford. Would you help me get a gig in New York City? I said, well, Dave, I can't help you get a gig unless I hear you play.

35:23So here's my here's my card, my home address, my home phone number. Send me a cassette of your playing and I'll be happy. Once I hear you play, I'll recommend you to the appropriate places. And he couldn't believe I was giving him. Hey, Sandy's given me his home number. He's like talking to a third person in the room. Hey, I can't believe you're giving me a home number. I said, don't no big deal, Dave, just send me a cassette. I got to go. I'm being hollered at by my own. I got to go. So so anyway, I left. He gave me a big hug. Very appreciative. Long story short, three years later, he called me and he said, hey, nothing happened. He sent me a cassette. Nothing happened with it. Three years later, he calls me and he says, hey, Sandy, I'm managing this girl now. She's going to be the biggest thing in 1984. We're doing our record in New York City. I want you to come down and I want you to be in her band. I said, Dave, I can't join a baby band. I'm coming off an arena tour. And, you know, with all due respect, everybody's new project is going to be the next big Sandy. You don't understand. I don't want you to miss this opportunity. You were so nice to me in the doorway.

36:24Your personality, your playing style would fit perfect with her. I want you to be in her band. I don't want you to miss this. Come down to the studio and meet her at least. So I went down to the studio and happened to be Cindy Lauper doing her first record in New York City. And so that started my association with Cindy Lauper. As soon as I walked in the room, I said to myself, seeing Cindy, I said, people are going to notice this woman, whether they hate her or love her. Was she just was she just electric? She was totally electric. You're like, I know, hair was shaved on one side. It was poofed out orange on the other side. She had this crazy voice like this. And I'm going, man, this is I never seen anything. It's dropped out of the sky or something. It was it was unbelievable. I said, you know, I'm going to. And then she played me some of the songs that they were working on. Girls just want to have fun and she bop and all of that. So I ended up doing the tour. And the bottom line is, yes, all right. That was another being nice to somebody in the doorway led to a gig.

37:25But how did it change your life? Because this is the this is the moment that changed my life is because on that Cindy Lauper tour, I met Sherry and we started dating and we saw each other. This was in November of 1984. We saw each other long distance for the rest of 84 into 85. A year later, she moved up to New York from Charlotte, North Carolina. And we started living together. 1990, we had we got married in 1994. We had our daughter, Jerry, and we're still together 36 years later because I gave somebody five minutes in a doorway to sign an autograph. This is how reaching out and thinking outside yourself without anything in return. Now, some the universe led Dave, Dave Wolf, his name is Dave, to that certain gig that led that somebody the universe inspired Dave to go to that concert, that Pat Travis concert at the Hartford Civic Center or whatever.

38:27And he somebody inspired the universe, inspired Dave to make his way backstage with no credentials at all. He had no laminate or whatever. So the universe works in very, very strange ways, not only to inspire you to do certain things, to increase your, you know, to go towards your goals, but the universe also inspires other people to come to your path in order to elevate you. I completely agree. I'm still stuck on. 30, 45 seconds ago, when you said Dave in the hallway led you to Cindy Lauper and it eventually led you to Joan Jett. But you said that Dave in the hallway led you to Sherry. Right. And most people in this world would look at the big break of playing with Cindy Lauper. But you look at it as that's the the thing that led me to meet my soulmate. And I am so impressed that that is the thing that that you went there.

39:27Well, everybody would go. It led me to and I say that my rainbow experience led me to a Renaissance with my wife. But like this whole. I know that's just really, that's really special. Well, I mean, what's how can you not think of that? I mean, there's other situations where I help somebody out and it led to the monkey's gig or, you know, I threw a drumstick to a handicapped person and that led to my speaking career. But all of this is like business. What led to, you know, it elevated me in terms of business up the business ladder. But how did we, you know, having a feeler feeling of empathy and having a feeling of altruism, how did that change your life? I mean, great business wise, money in the bank, credibility, something, another gig for the resume. But the Cindy Lauper, the Dave in the doorway, that led that changed my life because I'm still, you know, Sherry is is she's she's amazing.

40:30I don't know what I would do without her. I mean, she was the rock. She's the rock. She's the the the picture of consistency with me, with me being in the rock and roll business, which is like a one big fat roller coaster that never really ends ups and downs, ups and downs. But she was the calming force. She was the consistent thread through my life. And she's still there. And I don't know. I wouldn't be sitting here if I if I didn't stop in that doorway and sign that autograph. Five minutes changed my life. Five minutes of caring about wanting to provide somebody with a smile on their face changed my life. You know, there's a quote. I just my favorite book out there is by a guy named John Miller. It's called QBQ, the question behind the question. So I love your book, too. It's really good. But the one that I is required reading for everybody who's in leadership in my restaurants are it's called QBQ by John Miller. And he he phrases calls it QBQ service.

41:32He says, do for others what you don't have to do. Because that's awesome. That's the key to fantastic service. It's going up and down. And you did that in that moment. Whether you realize now like that, that you did for somebody else what you didn't have to do. Correct. You took a second to go above and beyond because you genuinely cared. And when you genuinely care, good things happen. Correct. You're not just going through the motions like you genuinely said, hey, man, what can I do for you? I'm you know, who also is a really good drummer, who is very, very similar, same mindset. Dave Grohl, the book over there. Yeah. Have you ever met him? I have not met him. He's he just that book is one of my favorite books of all time, because he's just so everything in his life was just gratitude. One day after one day, he just kept trying and working hard and being kind and gracious. And then one thing led another. Then he was in Nirvana. Nirvana was only a band for three and a half years. Did you know? Wow. No, I didn't know that. It's crazy. The whole Nirvana thing. Three and a half years, the whole band.

42:33But it's drummers and how he was very just things just started to happen when you do good things. And the and the the key is, Brandon, is that you do good things for others without expecting anything in return. You do it when nobody and there was nobody in that dressing room except me and Dave. And I didn't do it well. What is this guy going to do? What is, you know, what are you going to do for me? What are you going to do for me or whatever? I'll sign your autograph or whatever. But you do it when nobody's looking at you. But you know who is looking and it's not a person. The universe is looking. God is the God energy. I call it an energy. It's not a male, female and no no gender involved is. And it has nothing to do with organized religion. It can. But it really doesn't, because your religion is in your heart. So there's another moment in your book that you talk about little subtle God winks going to your terminology here. You guys got married. You and Sherry got married and you. Hey, are we going to have kids? I don't know if we're going to have kids.

43:34What are we going to do? And so, hey, look, let's get married first. And then you got married and then she she didn't talk about it. And then kind of it came back up and subtle hints. You know, maybe she's subliminally. Hey, what do you want for breakfast? Another child. All right, let's have a kid. And you were right there. You were thinking about it and you were going to go diving. Right. With your friend Mars. Correct. You did some reading there, Brandon. I read the book. Come on now, I was fascinated. So would you go and you're going to go diving outside of Miami. Correct. And tell the story. OK, well, we're thinking about I told my wife once you started bringing up kids again, I said, you know what, let me go diving. I'll chill out a little bit. It's my perfect, perfect scenario of relaxation. And on the way down to Miami, I prayed and I said, just send me a sign. I'm not sure if right now I'm sure about Sherry. I'm sure about our relationship, but I'm not sure if right this moment of time is the right time to have because I was touring. Sherry had a full time job managing the Hard Rock Cafe up the street.

44:37We lived in a one bedroom apartment, middle of Manhattan. Life was just awesome. And having a child at that point in time would necessitate me buying a house, moving and all of that. Dual income, no kids, having a good time. That's correct. Yeah, right. So I go scuba diving and on the way down, I said, just send me a sign. I just will just give me a sign. So anyway, we scuba dive my buddy Mars. It was his boat. He chose the dive site. He was the dive master. We we went down and dove a wreck. It was a tugboat. It was a tugboat. And he said, you know, I know how you are with souvenirs, Sandy. Just pull anything that you can. It's probably all picked over at the moment. But whenever you can grab off, don't don't pick any coral. Don't pick anything alive. He was very stringent about the ecology of that. So I picked off this. We went diving. I picked off a ring from it was a porthole ring. And I brought it back up to the surface. Now we're on back on the boat and I'm videotaping Mars describing what I took off the boat.

45:39And he's describing this metal. It's about maybe a brass ring, a brass ring. It was maybe 12 inches in diameter or whatever. But the long story short, I said, what was the name of the boat that we took that that we just dove? He goes and he looked in his dive log and he looked up the location and the name of the vessel. And it was called we're going to get the name of that vessel right after these words from our sponsors. You know what chefs want, some people still call it creation gardens. But what chefs want has been was our first advertiser on the show. Monty Crawford saw what we're doing. He goes, I want to be part of it, dude. I love it. And I just I love that. They're so perfect because they work with locally owned and operated restaurants better than anyone. And let me tell you how they do it. No minimums, no fees, no fuel surcharges, no surcharges any time. They deliver seven days a week. They have 24 seven customer support. You can call, text, chat, email anytime from anywhere.

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47:49The thing Jason does the best is he can help educate you on exactly what's going on with all of your dish machines and chemicals. He can do staff trainings to understand why you're using what you're using, again, to be intentional. They don't make you sign any type of contract. They are week to week and can get you a brand new dish machine with three free months of dish machine rental. You need to check them out. Go to NashvilleRestaurantRadio.com. Click the Sponsors tab and then you will see SuperSource. Click that tab for a special or give Jason Ellis a call at 770-337-1143. And now back to the interview with Sandy Gennaro. But the long story short, I said, what was the name of the boat? That we took that I that we just dove. He goes and he looked in his dive log and he looked up the location and the name of the vessel. And it was called it was a Mexican tugboat called the Concepcion, which is conception, the conception, the conception in Spanish.

48:52And I, I, I almost I don't know if I can say the S.H.I.T. Whatever you want, whatever you want. I almost shit my pants in my web suit. I almost shit my wet suit because I'm going, well, wait a minute. So anyway, I went we went back home. I went back home and I told my wife the story. And, you know, we immediately jumped in the sack. Let's go, let's go. I think it's it's it's cool. We got the green light or whatever. So that was the sign that I was on the right path that right then. And about maybe 10, 12 months later, our daughter was born. Jerry. Wow. Oh, and again, because you trusted and you believed. And there was that God wink that said, hey, look, I'm praying about this. Give me a sign. And then all of a sudden you're there diving and you're you're thinking about it. You're in your quiet place. I'm just doing this thing. And then what's the boat called? The conception. And I sometimes I think, well, I'm glad the boat wasn't called the contraception. But that's it. That's it.

49:53And, you know, another little tiny little element of that is that on the way down, we're praying for a sign. I visualized myself on the plane on the way back. I visualize the future and I visualize myself having a glass of wine with the the the the solution in my that I have gotten a sign. In other words, you visualize visualization is very important, too, as well. Visualizing the successful outcome of something that hasn't happened yet. And that that that is a very important aspect of my life, too. I always anticipate a positive. And again, it's like I bring I bring up the analogy of Christmas morning. When you get up five in the morning, you see the presents all wrapped up. You don't know what's inside those presents, but you know it's going to be good. And that's the way I look at the future. It's a positive anticipation, a positive visualization of and a result of a situation that hasn't happened yet. You can again, we have choices.

50:53We can always we can think of a negative outcome. Oh, what is the oh, I hope that this doesn't happen. Like a woe is me, Debbie Downer kind of vibe. Or you can look at it. Well, it's going to happen. It's going to be great. You know, and it may not turn out great, but when problems happen to people, they happen to teach us something. They do. Well, that's I like this quote that you said, but your mom used to say, if you want to learn how to swim, jump into the deep end of the pool. You learn to swim real fast. Right. You know, you want to drown. You got to do that. I think that so many people and there's a book we're doing. I'm doing a book club, Brandon's Book Club. This month, we're doing a book called The Comfort Crisis. Maybe we do your book. Oh, I hope so. And I'll come and do a reading for it. Yeah, it'd be fun. We're doing so we're doing a book called The Comfort Crisis. But it basically says is get outside of your comfort zone. They were also predisposed to 72 degrees in our entire life. Like go out there and sweat, know what it's like to beat. And I think that every day you have to try new things. You have to get outside of your comfort zone. And I'm most comfortable outside of my comfort zone. Is that weird? Yeah.

51:57No, it's not weird. I love change. I love crazy shit. I love it. Whatever it is. Like that sounds difficult and hard. Like you didn't, you weren't born knowing how to lay roof. I mean, you know, nobody knows how to do it. You have to learn it. You have to fail. You have to go out there and try new things and see what happens. And then you learn from it. It's all about growth. But if you look at that as a, Oh, I'm just going to fail. I'm not good at anything versus no, I can't wait to fail so that I can learn what not to do. Correct. I have a, I just built a smoking pit at my house. It's a, it's a huge four by seven, five by seven foot, 95 cinder blocks. It's a monster, right? This thing is a gigantic pit. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. I don't, I don't know how to do it, but a couple of weeks ago, I bought a bunch of wood, a bunch of charcoal and a bunch of meat. And use YouTube videos. Well, I used Pat Martin's book, life of fire, which was great, but like I just started doing this stuff and I was like, I don't know what I'm doing, but I'm going to test this thing. And I did, it wasn't bad, but it was a 12 hour day of hauling wood and a fire and a hundred degree day and the whole thing. But it's like, am I, was it fun? Did I learn a ton? Yes.

53:05I bet you how gratifying was it going out after it was all done and just, you know, lighten up a cigar and looking at what you just did, the accomplishment that you just did where 12 hours earlier, you had no clue what the eating of the ribs and the brisket, like just taking a, taking some tongs and grabbing a bone from the ribs, just pulling the bone out, just falling right out. Not even having to just, just, just falls. We're like, Oh, this is going to be good. Like having the family over, cause I had all this food at two racks of ribs, a full pork butt and brisket. And I was like, guys, we've got food for days. Let's go. But next time I do it, I'm going to get better. I'm going to constantly keep trying. You brought up a very good, the word of adaptability. I mean, it being someone in the music business and touring and recording, you have to, if you don't have a sense of adaptability, you're done. Just, just don't even bother picking up an instrument because a musician has to deal with adapting to change every single day on tour, for example, all the time, all the time. So yeah, adaptability.

54:11And you mentioned also something that reminded me of a quote that Thomas Edison said when he was inventing the light bulb. He said, I never made a mistake inventing the light bulb. I've only learned 10,000 ways how not to do it. There you go. That's so, you know, it's, it's, it's, you know, problems are growth. You know, there's, you know, failure is, I equate failure with school. Yeah, a hundred percent. You know, okay, I failed. How can I do it different? You figure out a different way to do it. You're successful at that different way. And all of a sudden your self-esteem builds up because you solved an issue. Now you learn how to do something where you didn't know how to do it a week before or an hour before a minute before. I contend the most successful people in the world aren't successful because of all of their victories. I think they're most successful because of their failures. Bingo. And that's a weird way to look at it, isn't it? I mean, popular to contrary, what you see on social media is, Oh, these people are great.

55:11Like you didn't see the 10 times they failed. That's correct. To get there. That's correct. You don't know what goes on behind closed doors. You see the final result. You know, when you see Aaron judge hitting Homer after Homer after Homer after Homer, but you have no idea how much time he spends in a cage with coaches. You know, baseball is my favorite analogy. The Hall of Famers fail seven of 10 times. Right. At the plate. Right. Hall of Famers. Hall of Famers. You bet 300 for your career. You're a Hall of Famers. Batting 300 is getting a hit three out of 10 times. Did you fail seven of 10 times? Hall of Famer. Think about like we've had a, I've had the mental skills coach for the Phillies on the show. Oh, her name. Oh, her name. Was that Rod Thoroughly's daughter? Rod's daughter. I forget. She's not on the Phillies anymore. And I think she's no, she's Texas Rangers. I'm in touch with Rod about her. I'm actually going to a ranger game in September in Arlington against my angels.

56:12I'm going to have to look her up. See if we can. Oh, that would be awesome. I'm sorry. I forget her name. I'm going to find out her name. Cause she was put on the show. She was amazing. I can't think right now. I don't have it right now. Sports psychologist and she'll tell you how important visualization is and a positive attitude is when you're at bat, trying to face a hundred mile. Hit a round ball with a round bat coming at you at a hundred miles an hour. Her episode was so fascinating because she just talked about players in a rut and like what you do and how you get out of it and how you get out of your own head, your own head, your own head stops you from doing exactly. You're with you a hundred percent of the day and I get in my own head all the time, but you go, Hey, look, nobody gives a shit. Nobody, nobody, nobody thinks what you're thinking right now. Right. It's okay. Right. Just move on with your life. Right. Stop it. And I could sit and go, I can't believe I said that in the interview. I told that story about that. Fuck it. Let's go. It's gone. It's gone. Worried about it. This is the thing that it's me and I got to get used to just being me. Right. Absolutely. All right. So you have an acronym.

57:15The book is called beat the odds and your acronym is beats. Correct. Is it beats plural? Beats plural. The S is the one of the most important attributes of that acronym. Service. Correct. Right. So it's belief, enthusiasm, attitude, tenacity and service. So do you want, we're 45 minutes in. Do you want to go over each one of these letters? Give kind of a brief, how do you want, what's the most important one? You want to talk about service? Where do you want to go from here? Okay. It's a five letter acronym. And I think the, at the, at the top of the pyramid is the middle letter, which is a, I think the most important parts of that acronym attributes of that acronym is belief, belief in a higher power, belief in yourself and belief in a power greater than ourselves as a, at work. The other bill and the enthusiasm, the E comes as a result of your belief. Your attitude is very important.

58:20That's how you think and your attitude towards people and the attitude towards events that happen in your life and that happened in the world. That's a very important building block and service. So you have belief, attitude and service to others. That's what we've been talking about going through your life with a, an attitude and a spirit of altruism, thinking outside yourself, how can I make someone's life better? How can I put a smile on somebody's face? So very simply put it's belief, attitude and service. And then the enthusiasm comes as a result of your belief, your attitude and service and your tenacity comes as a result because you're tenacious in your effort. You have a passion because of your belief, you have a passion because you know, you think positive and you know a positive thing is going to happen if you think in the right way and you treat people in the right way. And I'm sitting here as a prime example of how true that situation is is, is as a result of how you treat people and how you, you, your perception of events that happen to you. That's your attitude, thoughts, you control your thoughts.

59:35You mentioned before that we will have thousands of thoughts that come in our brain from a good place and a, and a negative place every day. And it's our choice. It's our our control of our thoughts that come in and what we allow to sink in what we pay attention to matters because we, we have to be kind of like a thought police, like a, like a overseer of, you know, at the gated entry of your mind, you filter the thoughts and you allow thoughts to be entertained. The ones that you choose to entertain. Wow. Yeah. It's a, it's a, because thoughts are like seeds and you put a thought, a fertile seed, infertile soil and you give it water and you give it sunlight. It's going to grow. It's a, it's a, it's a law of nature, you know? So if the thoughts that you think about more often because and constantly, especially in the relaxed state, your mind is relating that I'm not going to get into meditation and we can get it. I was just about to ask, I say, do you meditate?

01:00:40Well, I, I, I, I, I have this, this app on my, I don't do it as often as I should and I definitely don't do it daily, but I do have moments during the day where I just relax for a second. I don't, I wouldn't call it meditation. I do it once in a while, but not very often. But in your, in a relaxed state, you have to be in a relaxed state because having, if you have a mind that's, you know, before you go to bed at night and when you wake up in the morning, right in those moments of twilight, before you fall asleep or after you wake up, think, think if you have a bunch of turbulent, a turbulent, ocean being an analogy, being your mind, and you have a lot of thoughts and oh, what am I going to do about this? Negative. If you have a turbulent, a mind that's like a turbulent ocean, you can drop a boulder in there and nothing, you're not going to notice any difference. But if you have a mind like a calm mind relaxed and you eradicate all the negativity and you, it's like a calm lake and you throw a pebble in a calm lake and you'll see the ripples for a long, long time.

01:01:48That's the analogy of having a calm mind and you place a thought in that calm mind and you think about it often and you recite it to yourself because you have, I mentioned this positive thought. Well, it works for positive and negative. You know, what you think about negatively, oh, oh, oh, this, I'm going to fail at this. I'm going to fail at this. I'm going to, this is not going to work out, blah, blah, blah. You know, you believe it and think about it more often that you're going to do actions in order to make that happen. Whether you think you can or you think you can't. You can. You're right. Okay. That's, that's a very, I love that. My favorite quote. I love it. So it's like putting a seed in fertile soil. The fertile soil is your calm mind. The seed is the thought. The more often you think about it and you verbalize it to yourself, especially when you verbalize it to another person, it becomes the universe hears that and, and all of a sudden you're, you, you, you're going down that path towards what you perceive. You know what I mean?

01:02:53So it's, in other words, the, it's, um, um, it's, it's very, very powerful and we have to have the thought remote in our hand all the time. Like you're watching TV and if something comes on the screen that you don't like, you change the channel, boom, or you highlight, delete in your computer. So you have to be a monitor of what the thoughts you think about. And I think it's real easy to say everything you just now said, having practiced it for a while for those who are listening to this thinking, well, that's easier said than done. You're right. It is. You have to, this is something that doesn't just happen overnight. If you're, if you're prone to negative thinking, if you're prone, if your mind is that crazy water that you're talking about, that, that just that ocean, that rocky ocean, it doesn't become a still pond overnight. Like, and I, you talk about meditation. I love to med. It's maybe my favorite things in the world to do is meditate because it, it helps calm that water for me.

01:03:55And if you do it in the beginning of the day, there's a bunch of apps, there's insight timer, there's headspace, headspace is a headspace has a 10, 10 episodes as you start for free and hit learn to meditate. And it's a, and it's so, I think there's this fear that, well, I, my brain is so clouded. My brain, it just wanders every time. It's like, that's okay. Yeah. It's like working out like, well, I, I see the guys in the gym lifting the two plates on the bench. I can't do that. Like you gotta start somewhere and you gotta take one foot and put it in front of the other and start walking before you run. You've gotta, if you get this app, start the day off, start a meditation, just a, even if you just go sit outside by it, leave your phone away, sit outside by yourself with your thoughts and practice gratitude. Think about five things that you're really grateful for. And it's real easy to do sitting in an air conditioned home is start there. Right. I'm sitting in a 72 degree room. That's pretty cool. In 90 degrees outside.

01:04:55I'm going to go have a cup of coffee or I'm going to hear birds chirping. I'm going to do whatever it is. Just stop and feel that moment. When you're done, you're going to go, wow, I just took a vacation from that crazy boiling. This, this, this storm that you, I just think of this, that when you said that the rough seas, I just think, God, my brain gets there at nighttime sometimes. And I have to turn it off so that I can sleep. And that's why I used to, I used to drink. I used to drink. That'll turn it off. I just got to start drinking. And now I've learned that I don't have to do that. And I can just take a few moments to myself and leave my phone away. Or sometimes it's pulling up my phone. I don't know. But that gratitude, I think is the main thing when you start practicing things like, I'm really, I'm really fortunate. I'm going to go get in my car. Well, it's a piece of shit car, but it's a car that's going to get you as you drive by. People stand at the bus stop as you correct whatever it may be. It's not a, I'm better than you kind of a thing. It's just being grateful that you have what other people lack every day.

01:05:58And that works in any way you go. And that's the beginning point. Once you start recognizing that, that calm happens, and then you're able to pay it forward. Then you're able to say, Hey, look, I find grad, I'm going to be, I'm, Hey man, what's up? Let me sign your thing. Let me take a picture with you. Right. Cause I've, I found that. Right. I just, there's a practical way to, to start practicing the things that you're talking about. And I just wanted to kind of get into some of that, like, cause it doesn't happen overnight. How, where do I start Sandy? Well, you start, you know, if you have a problem thinking positive, sit down and have the discipline, sit down and close your eyes and think about the state of our planet today. Think about, you know, if you want to be grateful and I know this is kind of people are going to go, well, that's the opposite. The opposite happens when I watch the news, watch the evening news about now and what's, what's happening is there's a big fire, there's a fire, there's a flood.

01:06:59And I, I, I, there's a flood in Kentucky and it's two, it's 200 miles from Nashville where we're sitting right now, where people's houses are under water is 200 miles from here. So think about the plight of those people. Think about the plight of the victims of a natural disaster, the fires in the Pacific Northwest, the floods in Kentucky, the war in the Ukraine, what's happening with the world economy recession, whatever. Think about, think about the circumstances that a lot of people on this planet, you know, the people that go to bed hungry, where you go to, while you're thinking about that, you're on your way to the fridge to get a doughnut and some, you know, so a milk, milk and cookies or whatever, you know what I mean? So, and you have, you're in a 72 degree house, we're sitting in, you know what I mean? There's always, if you look, it doesn't take much to look around and be thankful for what you have. We, yeah, your car's a piece of shit, but again, like you said, look at the person on the bus stop, you know, your house is a whatever, but.

01:08:03I, I, I'm seeing a new therapist. We're going to actually today, but I'm, I'm seeing a new therapist, which is amazing. And I love it. I need that, that for me, but doing the questionnaire when seeing a therapist is a really great way to practice gratitude. And I'll tell you why, cause I asked you a question. Are you in fear of abuse at home? I'm like, no, are you how many nights a week do you go to bed in fear of your next meal? I don't at all. Are you in fear? How many times has your electricity been cut off in the past year? You're like, it hasn't. Have you like, are you in fear of not having reliable transportation? Are you in fear? And it's like all these questions and I'm like, I'm doing pretty fucking good. Yeah, right. Over the top right now. And it's like, well, and also I felt an empathy. I felt like a man, there are people that check those boxes, right? Check those boxes and like, what can I do? I want to help. Like I don't know where it is. Am I in a position to help? I don't know, but I know I need help. I'm going to, I have all those things and I need therapy.

01:09:10Like there's not a point to where you're like, I'm done, I'm fixed, I'm better. And I think service, that service side is where my brain immediately goes to I want to help those people. What can I do to help the people that don't have a place to live or the electricity? Like what can I do? And so it's weird how your brain just starts to go there. So I, it's funny cause I had this moment a few weeks ago when I started seeing this person and I went, wow, I'm, I'm pretty damn fortunate. Did you let me interrupt. Did you think while you're filling out check, when you're filling out that application or that questionnaire, did you ever think after seeing all those questions, you ever think, well, what, what, what am, what am I doing here? What? No, no, I didn't think that at all. No, I know I'm, I know, I needed to be there, right? Look, you know what? I think like anybody mental health is so vital and I'm doing, I wasn't well for a really long time. I was sick for years.

01:10:12Depression is real. All this stuff, no matter who you are. Like, so I mean I'm up here talking to the drummer from Cindy law. I'm talking to a celebrity here and I've got these people, I have this, this life I portray on this podcast is positive and it is man. I'm I love life every day. I want to just, yes, like seize the day, right? I'm Carpe Diem every day Mondays. Yes. But that doesn't mean that I don't get scared. Right. Times doesn't mean that my relationship isn't perfect. I'm a dad to kids. I don't know if I'm doing the right thing. I have three full-time jobs. Like, I don't know. Like there's a lot of stuff that like everybody needs behind closed door, behind the closed door of your mind. You know, you, you know, you, with the thing, Brandon, that I'm again, speaking to the whole thing where you don't know what goes on behind closed doors. And I don't mean the physical closed doors. I mean the mental closed doors. When, when a person is by themselves, you get these people that are successful and whatever, and then you read that they ace themselves, that they, that there was a suicide situation and what could be going on in somebody's mind.

01:11:19Because to me, when you do something like that, that's a permanent solution to a temporary problem. And, and I, I can't, I can't put myself in somebody's shoes that would go to that extent to alleviate how much pain and suffering could somebody have to, to, to necessitate that action, to end that pain and suffering, permanently. When from the out, from the, from the external, from the, from the, you know, the impression that other people have about that person is that they had the life to have a successful company, a beautiful family. You know, they left three kids and a beautiful house and what, so what could be, what, what could be that strong of an issue to, to cause somebody to do that? And the manner of suicide doesn't really matter, whether it's a gunshot or over the overdose or whatever. Naomi Judges recently. Right. I mean, Naomi Judges was people that I saw, she came to the restaurant all the time, her and Larry did. And every time you go and talk to her and she was friendly and she was kind and she's gosh, she's a member of the judge and she's thought to be in the hall of fame and like all these things. And you don't know what's going on, right?

01:12:30You don't know what's going on. And I mean, that's where that, that's where that moment, that smile, that good morning to somebody, that you have no idea what's happened to somebody's face and they walk inside the door of your restaurant. Right. And that's where that friendly welcome, we're excited you're here. Like I thought everybody hates me. Like I'm in a bad place, but I walk in here and you guys make me feel great. You guys give me hope there's something that we do and that's more than just I'm a waiter. I'm right. That's where I kind of look at this, this job in the service industry. Like I take it serious. Like we're providing something that gives people hope, that gives people a better day. Like it's really fascinating. If you genuinely believe that you can have a really good time waiting tables. Absolutely. You have a really good time being a host, being a bartender, being a manager, whatever it might be in the service industry. When you can really grasp that. Right. It's pretty special. And that that attitude comes from the leadership that those waiters and waitresses have. And that's you Brandy.

01:13:32Well it comes from leadership. It also comes from hiring people with really good attitudes. Attitude is the only thing that I really hire for. Right. I had a kid come in one time. I've told this story 50 times on the podcast, but I'll tell you it came in and he said, I said, if you're waiting tables for and he goes, nope, never happened. I go, oh, well we took like a little more experiences at Mary bowl. And I said a little more experience because we've got, you know, I've got a hundred wines on the list and there's some pretty elevated bourbons and food. And he goes, look, I'm a sharp kid. I'm going to go to NYU. I'm going to do this and this. I'm going to make mistakes. He said, but I'll tell you what, I will never make the same mistake twice. He goes, I learned from my mistakes and I'm eager and excited to learn. I'm super curious and this is a job I really want to do. You're hired. Right. I mean, how do you say no to, I know I'm going to make mistakes, but I only make mistakes one time. I'm going to learn from them. Like, that's it, man. That's the key to life. He's passionate. He's passionate about being successful. You just hit it. Like you're, I don't, whatever you do at this point, I want to, I want to see you make the mistakes. I'm now, now it's a science experiment.

01:14:35I want to see how well you do this. And I want to tell your story, because that's the mindset you have to have in everything that you do. Really? My opinion. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Um, Sandy, this has been a lot of fun. I, I, I, I really appreciate, I was looking forward to this Brandon. And, uh, it's been a lot of fun. I love the conversation. It's awesome. I want to get into like stories of like Joan Jett, like on stage, what is that dynamic? Like, like when you're there, she, is there a look that she would give when you would need to do something different or you're transitioning or was it all, what were the, what do people throw on the stage? I mean, you know, like if you're back in those days, you make Kip winger, you know, he lives here in town. I was going to ask you, how many of those people that you talk about live in Nashville now? Like a lot of people live in Nashville. Um, yeah, Kip, Kip is one of them. Um, and Paul, his guitar players are regular. He comes into the grill a lot. Paul.

01:15:37Oh, Paul, Paul. Yeah. I forget his name. Uh, him and his wife, our beach, red beach. Uh, yeah. Uh, the keyboard player too, uh, in wingers. Um, but anyway, the lead singer and, uh, Vince Neil lives here. The lead singer, Motley crew. Um, just, who do you hang out with? Do you hang out with those guys? Do you like, I'm getting the Howard Stern side of this thing. Who do you party with? What's going on? I really don't party that much. I'm, I'm basically a homebody. Uh, I, because I, I've spent my life in bars and clubs and, and arenas and you know, I mean, and people ask me, Oh, are you going to go to the Joan Jett show and a Motley crew and Def Leppard at, uh, no, no, I didn't go. I didn't go because that's at Nissan stadium and it's, it's four hour gig and is waiting online in the parking. I just, you know, at my age, Brandon, I just rather sit home with my dog and my wife and watch the Yankees talk to my, my daughter online.

01:16:39Cause she's on the road now with a band called the, uh, sleigh bells and, um, she's road manager. Yeah, it was a bad part of the sleigh bells. Yeah. Uh, they're a New York based band and they're coming to Nashville. I think, uh, August 16th and playing the exit in here in Nashville. But my daughter is the tour manager. And, um, so I, I, I much rather be home than go out and, because I've seen that movie already. I've done, I've done that, you know, after on tour with Joan Jett and Cindy Lauper, the band used to always go to like the, they play the arena in town, but you go to the bar, you go to the rock club in town. And we need to tell those stories. I don't know what happened at the rock club after the Cindy Lauper concert in 1985. Uh, well there was, we played, well, one interesting story that happened when I was on the road with Cindy Lauper, uh, it was New Year's, it was a Halloween and we played Birmingham, Alabama. And I remember Cindy never really used to come out with the band. Like the band used to go to a rock club. She was dating. She was, had a live in boyfriend and that was Dave in the doorway. That was, uh, Oh, so she was dating David. Well, she was living with David. Okay. Um, yeah, she was living, she, she had a relationship that that relationship is no longer, but, uh, cause Cindy is married to another Dave, forget his last name.

01:17:57He's an actor and they have a child, a kid, a boy that, and Dax, I think his name is anyway. Anyway, going back to Birmingham, Alabama, after Cindy Lauper concert, we played the big arena there as Halloween 1984 and the, and Cindy decided to go out to this club with the band and the road manager came with us and some of the crew came with us. And, and, uh, unlike our, our, our road manager usually used to call ahead and say, Hey, we're going to bring, can we put us on the guest list or whatever? We'll find out about security, whatever. But our road manager didn't do this. So for this particular gig, I don't know why, maybe you couldn't get ahold of the manager of the club or whatever, but we all were there waiting online to get into this club. This is, um, you know, maybe 11 o'clock on Halloween night. And they were in the process, the club. Once we got in, we realized that they were having a Halloween costume contest. So Cindy walks in, we walk with the band and she, she goes, watch this. And she, she, she goes up to the line, waiting online. She, Cindy Lauper was online dressed as Cindy Lauper.

01:19:09She goes, I'm dressed as Cindy Lauper. And she, so when, when she gets to the, you know, everybody in the club basically kind of knew what was going on because we had just played the arena in Birmingham like a couple of hours earlier. So she went and she won, she won the best costume contest because she was dressed like Cindy Lauper. And it was Cindy Lauper. Did anybody know? Yeah, because some, some, yeah, by the time she got to the front, everybody kind of knew, but it was like a big joke. You know, the, the, the MC was going, yeah, we have a winner. We have, you know, so everybody kind of, it was in on the joke, but yeah, it was awesome. So we ended up sitting in with the band there and it was, it was an awesome night. It was great. Yeah. Wow. That's just, that's a crazy story. Yeah. I mean, I, you know, you talk about it, was there a certain signal that you, that, um, you know, you know, drummers need to be need to serve the song and they need to serve the gig. And I always kept my, my eyes laser focused on whatever singer I'm supporting.

01:20:14And one of the reasons I've been told, one of the reasons my, of my success in the rock and rock and roll business, because I never tried to shine the light on me. I'm there as the drummer, the engine of the car, the backbeat, the backbone of the band, as the band, as the drummer goes, the band goes, I don't care how big or small the band is. The drummer is the leader of the band, no matter what gig it is. And it's my responsibility to serve the song a and to serve the singer. And I never, Cindy used to tell me Sandy, if there's not a crash on the record, don't be crashing it live, play exactly what's on the record live. So that was a challenge, uh, because I had to play the same way every single night and the same, there was one moment in the show where I can really let, let loose. And it was one of those endings where it was a rock and roll ending like. And then you got a little fan for, it just go crazy. And I would go crazy.

01:21:24I'd let out like an hour and 15 minutes worth of fills and chops. And, and Cindy used to come in during that 10 seconds of craziness. She used to come on the riser and hit my cymbals with towels and whatever. I got pictures of her doing that. But anyway, the point is that you serve the song, and that's why I'm as successful as I am in supporting, because you're in a spirit of support. And in my presentation, I talk about, I analogize how a leader of a company or the general manager of a restaurant is like being the drummer in the band, where the restaurant goes as you go. I made this reference to the general manager yesterday. Oh, you're not the general manager? No, I'm the director of operations. I have general managers at both the locations. I see. So they actually, I only have two people that report to me, all the restaurants, and it's both the general managers. I see. So, but it's... I apologize.

01:22:24I'm honored to be considered either way. It doesn't matter to me what I'm called. But I told the general manager, I said, every day when managers walk, they set the pace. They're whatever, if you walk in the door and you're pissed off, guess what? The rest of the staff, you give them permission to act whatever you are. So if you walk in and you're motivational and you're excited to be there, and let's get this thing going. Guess what? It lifts everybody else up because they're kind of mirroring your energy. So when you come in, your energy has got to be strong. It's got to be there. That's me. There you go. Do you like, what are you on? And I was like, nothing. Life. Like I just, yeah. I'm like, I'm gratitude. I'm on gratitude. I'm gracious. I get to be here today. This is my dream career and I get to do it. And I was like, oh, he's so exhausting. Like, yeah, I am. And I'm not going to stop. That's what I do. And that's a big part of the presentation, how I metamorphosize the drummer slash leader because you as the leader, you as the drummer, you're in a spirit of support of your other musicians.

01:23:31You know, when the guitar player is doing a solo, you don't want to upstage him and you play the solid beat that found lay the foundation upon which he can shine. And that's what a leader, true leader should do is create the situation where an employee can shine. Yeah, you are leading future leaders. You want people to be successful. You don't want to pound people down. You want to ask questions if they're not performing right and give them all the hardware and the inspiration to do well. You want them to do well. You know, and that's my role as a drummer in a band is that I support, number one, the person whose name is on the marquee. And if Cyndi Lauper wants to cut my hair and my big, long rock and roll hair down to my tits and I'm going to cut. Hey, Sandy, do you mind if I cut your hair? But I want to leave your ponytail long and I want to dye it red. Do you mind if I do that? Not at all, Cyndi.

01:24:31I'm working for you. Let's go. Your name is on the marquee. You sign my checks. I'm there to serve you. And that's what and the drummer is the leader, the musical leader of a band. But yet I'm there to serve. And that's why that's what makes a leader a great leader is that he is the leader. You answer to him, but he's there to serve you and want to make you successful. So did you ever want to do you write your own songs? Did you ever think you ever wanted to lead your own band? Like Max Weinberg kind of a I never I never really got into writing. I tried at one point. As a matter of fact, when I was with Cyndi Lauper, we went to the Casio, which made synthesizers and went to the factory. And as a because Cyndi endorsed Casio or some or the keyboard player endorsed Casio. And we were all given keyboards. We were all given synthesizers. So I brought my home and I'm going, well, wait a minute, I just got this for free. I'll put the headphones on and I'll take keyboard lessons.

01:25:32And with keyboard lessons and learning some musical theory, I can write songs. So let's give that a go. I'm saying to myself. So I taught I bought myself some books and I taught my and then practicing for an hours on the keyboards. I'm going, why am I practicing this when I still have so much more to learn about drumming? Well, because you needed to do that to open your eyes to learn more about drumming. I that's right. It's true. So I kind of gave up the keyboard. I still have the keyboard at home. As a matter of fact, it's antique, whatever. So to answer your question, I wrote a few songs in my life. One of them was Tweezers of Your Love, which I ended up. Tweezers of Your Love. I ended up singing that on Johnny Carson. I was picked on Stump the Band. That's another another situation of visualization. You know, watching Stump the Band, Johnny whatever. That's another story. Well, let's tell a story how we got 10. We got five minutes left. One more good story. I was a big fan of the Johnny Carson show when he hosted this tonight show.

01:26:35And I loved it. I loved him. I laughed my ass off every single night. And it was the last thing I watched before I went to bed at home. It was a 90 minute show, 1130 to one o'clock in the East Coast. So I especially when he played this game called Stump the Band. And the idea of the game was that every you know, Johnny hosted his show five nights a week. But every three weeks, he played this game. And the idea of the game was he would go in the audience, randomly pick somebody out of the audience. They would mention the name of a song, like an antidote song or whatever. A funny little song. If the Tonight Show Band didn't guess the song based on the name that the contestant would win, the audience member would then win a dinner for four or whatever. It's just a silly little game. And I said to myself, after I shut the Tonight Show off, when he would play Stump the Band, I said, man, if I was ever on Stump the Band, I know exactly what song I would sing because I wrote it. And I'm going to be on Stump the Band. I'm going to be on The Tonight Show. I love The Tonight Show.

01:27:36And I used to dream about it. And I had one of those realistic dreams about being, I dreamt and I visualized myself on Carson, dreamt about in great detail. The microphone, Johnny sitting there interviewing me, The Tonight Show Band. What the big TV camera on a dolly and whatever. The way the lights looked in the studio. Sure. And I woke up the next morning and I actually had one of those dreams where I actually believed that I was on. Did that really happen? And then I looked around and then all of a sudden reality kicked in. But 1976, I moved to Los Angeles from New York to get my first big break in the music business and Johnny emanated his show from Burbank at the time. I sent away for tickets. I got the tickets to go and I went to The Tonight Show, was seated in the audience and Johnny, on that given night, he decides to play one night. It was planned that he would play Stump the Band. And I'm the first person he picked out of the audience.

01:28:36Just randomly. And I stood up and he goes, what's the name of the song? And I said, whatever. You have to watch it. It's on my YouTube channel. If you're searching on my YouTube channel, it had. You said tweezers of my love. Tweezers of your love. Tweezers of your love. And obviously I wrote the songs that the band didn't know it and I wanted dinner for four. But the punch line is, is that that was my, I was an audience member but I went on to appear on The Carson Show with Lopper, Cyndi Lopper twice, two other times and now I'm in the green room with Johnny Carson before we go on stage with The Tonight Show with Cyndi. And I said to Johnny, hey Johnny, this is 1984 when I was on there with Cyndi. And I appeared, I did Stump the Band in 1976, 77. Johnny, do you remember me being on Stump the Band? He goes, man, we had a lot of people on Stump the Band. He goes, what song did you sing? And I went, tweezers of your love. He went, you're the guy that gave the chords to the song.

01:29:38Because when he says, hey, Sandy, when I was on Stump the Band, he goes, hey, what's the name of the song? And I said, tweezers of your love. And I said, for the benefit of the band, it's G, A minor, D to G. I gave the band the chords to the song. And subsequently, when I met him backstage, he said, hey, Sandy, I mentioned tweezers of your love. He goes, you're the guy that gave the chords to the, you're the only guy. And that's what made him remember. So I ended up being on Carson with Cindy twice. And then when Jay Leno hosted it, I was on it with the Monkees. So I was on the total tonight show. You see, you dream about something and you visualize something. The way the universe works, you end up getting it. So be careful what you wish for. Well, like Howard says, I said, well, we've covered it all. Awesome. I've learned a lot today. So have I. I've really appreciated. And I've learned a lot about you, Brandon. And I appreciate that very much. It's been a lot of fun. The last thing we do on the show is we do the Gordon Food Service final thought.

01:30:42OK, so what this is, is you get to take us out, take us out, whatever you want to say, as long as you want to say it, kind of a final thought, some eyes, whatever advice, whatever, whatever you want, as you could say, whatever you want, the mic is yours. Well, just you know, the message is just be positive and, you know, think about the Beats acronym of belief, enthusiasm, attitude, tenacity and service. And if you want to learn more about it, go to my website, which is SandyGennaro.com. If you want a signed copy of my book, Beat the Odds in Business and Life, go to my website. If you want a pair of Beat the Odds drumsticks, they're available there. If you just want the book and don't care if it's signed or not, just go to Amazon and search my name, SandyGennaro. And if you want to reach me, my email is Sandy at SandyGennaro.com. I answer all of my emails. It might take a day or two, but go ahead and let me know what you think.

01:31:42Let Brandon know what you think of this podcast. And and I look forward to to to hearing from all of you. I appreciate it. Sandy, thank you so much. Would they have this book at Parnassus? They do not. They do not. We can buy it locally. Well, you know what? I it's funny you mentioned that because I filled out an application to do to have them carry the book. But being that it was released in May, they they they tend to promote books that would just about to be released or released like really, really recently. OK, gotcha. So the feds. So it's not available on Parnassus, unfortunately. All right. Well, get on Amazon. You can follow SandyGennaro. That's S-A-N-D-Y-G-E-N-N-A-R-O. It has been an absolute pleasure. Thank you again for coming by today and I wish nothing but the best of success. I appreciate it, Brandon. Thank you so much. And I wish you the best and congratulations on your sobriety. Thank you, man.

01:32:42Well, that was a ton of fun. Thank you guys for sticking in there an hour and a half talking with SandyGennaro. I hope you guys enjoyed that interview. Please go to NashvilleRestaurantRadio.com. Vote for your favorite Mexican restaurant. Go to Brandon's Book Club. And if you want the book, let me know. I'll be happy to purchase it for you. And stay tuned Monday. Pearl Diver, Ben and Jamie. It is a freaking awesome show. You're going to love it. I cannot wait to put this out there. Lots of things going on. Thank you guys for listening. Hope you're being safe. Love you guys. Bye.